"You're counting centi-beats"

This would be a lot funnier sans-Global Warming nonsense but it's still pretty great:

Spinal Tap reunites!

Classic photo

Minnesota Twins playing baseball more like the Olsen twins

Morneau or Mary-Kate?

I don't know about you but I find that a great way to win baseball games is to score some runs. Typically you want to score more than the other team. If you do this, you may win a baseball game. Maybe somebody could explain this concept to Ron Gardenhire or Michael Cuddyer or the 5 batters in a row that have absolutely no power and horrid OBP's.

Also stop saying "they threw a good ballgame" about guys that have ERA's in the upper 8's. This has happened for the last 6 nights. I'm pretty sure I could go 3-4 off of Fausto Carmona or Odalis Perez.

The ravages of global warming

I'm not naive enough to say that today's snowfall in the Twin Cities and the last two plus weeks of 20 and 30 degree temperatures across the nation are enough to disprove global warming (or "climate change" as some are now referring to it in order to cover their own arses) but can't we at least agree that weather if nothing else is completely random? With reliable weather records only being kept for the last 120 years how can we possibly know what's a "normal" temperature anyway? If the earth is truly 4.5 billion years old or whatever 120 years of "warming" means absolutely nothing.

Plus I'm still not sure how there can be a consensus that New York City will be underwater in 2057 but Paul Douglas can't reliably predict if it's going to snow tomorrow or not. Weather is cyclical and random.

Of course having New York underwater isn't all bad: no more New York Yankees!

Al Gore is a genius but he's no Paul Bako

(if you don't know who Paul Bako is try the Google. If you don't know who Al Gore is I envy you.)

April 3 and 36 degrees? 32 and snow tomorrow?

I'm just going to go ahead and declare tomorrow, April 4th "Global Warming Day."

To celebrate let's all eat bowls of dirt and buy $4700 worth of energy saving lightbulbs (approx. 5 bulbs). Then Jake Gyllenhaal (in bunny costume) will come down the chimney to give us our presents.